Dear Agony
by Anisoka21
Summary: Love isn't always beautiful... love isn't always perfect like they say in books or what you see in movies... And Ahsoka has already figured that out. Will she change her feeling for Anakin? Or will she continue to love him dearly? And will Anakin want to leave her or will he want her back? Please review!
1. I'm Nothing

_**A/N: Hey, guys! I'm hoping all of you are relieved that it's finally freaking thanksgiving break! I seriously need this break. It's my first months of high school and it's been a struggle. Home, personal life has also been hell. Anyway, I'd like to let you guys know that I'll still try to continue working on "Love Is Everything," until my mind burns out of ideas for that storyline. :) hope you enjoy this story. It has some things that have occurred in my life. And, Sis, if you're reading this... You'll understand the story more. I've been depressed lately but I'm slowly getting back to normal. Anyway, enough about my crap, I hope you enjoy this story. I hope none of you will think it sucks. If you do think it will, then, go read something else. :)**_

_**Love, Anisoka21**_

_**And to my Favorite man in the entire world, Ben Burnley. Who writes the most amazing songs ever. **_

_**Also, to the man that is my life.**_

_**If you're reading this... Just know I'll never forget you. **_

**Ahsoka Tano's POV**

I walked down the enormous halls of the Jedi Temple, biting my lip from quivering.

Anakin wasn't in the best... Mood this entire week. He and I had an argument just last night and we haven't even looked at each other ever since. A couple of times I tried to speak to him but he just turned around and left.

The darkness of my room didn't quite help my depression. But it was relaxing. I stepped in my quiet room, sighing.

_'We need to be over...'_

_'Don't destroy yourself because of him...'_

I grasped the carpet underneath me, rocking back and forth. I began to whimper.

_'He's not worth killing yourself for...'_

_'You can do so much better than me in this life, Soka.'_

_'... Take care of her for me ok? I love her and she needs someone...'_ Anakin told Barriss this after our argument.

I huffed out deep, shallow breaths, sobbing.

_'You can't honestly want to be with me..._' Anakin told me so long ago.

Anakin sighed, _'You need to move on...' _

_'Why are you doing this?'_ I cried to him.

_'Just pretend I never came into your life...'_ he announced softly.

I gripped the rug beneath me, trembling.

_'I wish he knew I love him so much that I'd give up my life for his. If something were to happen to him, I'd sacrifice everything for him...'_

_'I'll be here as long as I don't get you in trouble...'_

I wept, getting up quickly. "_LIAR_!" I cried, throwing items and flipping the furniture over. "You liar! You promised me that you'd be here and you left me!"

Barriss came in, fear clearly shown on her face. "Ahsoka, stop! Please, calm down" she shouted, restraining my hands in front of us.

I looked at her with crazy eyes. "I _can't_, Barriss!" I screamed, tears leaving my eyes like crazy.

"You need to calm down," she whispered.

I broke down in front of her, unable to keep my emotions within me.

After my shower that was filled with tears I hugged my knees. Barriss was out with a couple of friends, asking me before she left if I wanted her to stay. I didn't want her stay with me just to keep me company. She needed to go out for a while.

I wiped the tears away, but the air kept hitching in my throat. Suddenly, I grew furious. I let out a yell, searching around my dorm for a sharp item.

_'Damn, no knives...'_ I cursed under my breath. Barriss must've taken them all. _'There's got to be something -'_

I quickly snatched a toothpick, and began scratching the back of my hand. I continued to cry but it felt... Good. The emotional pain was fading slowly away as I felt pain on my hand. But the memories of what happened replayed in my head.

I sobbed again, rubbing the wooden sharp toothpick deeply against my flesh.

"Stupid thing, why won't you do anything?!" I cried, rubbing harder.

I gave up and threw the tiny item across the room. My hand felt like it was on fire... I looked at it and it was all scratched up. One specific scratch almost began to bleed, but it wasn't deep enough.

I didn't have anyone but myself... Of course I had Barriss and some fellow Jedi, but I still felt alone. Barriss is the only one who gets me but she can't always be here to support me. I know she tries her hardest to keep me alive and happy and I try to do the same. But at some points, like now, I can't stop thinking about ending my life.

I sighed, getting up slowly like the dead being I am, and grabbed my black leather journal.

_'The aggressive argument_

_Though it's heartbreaking..._

_I'm hoping this is not the end...' _

I shut my book closed when I felt Master Plo's presence drawing closer by a second.


	2. Dear Agony

**Ahsoka Tano's POV**

Master Plo walked in with a very disappointed expression.

I looked down, sitting cross-legged while fidgeting with my fingers.

He must've sensed my anger but what else could he expect from a fourteen year old girl?

"Little Soka, I know you're in pai -" he spoke.

"I'm not in pain," I hissed, clenching my teeth. "I'm just... Tired."

He looked around, gesturing my room. "So you're tired but you managed to almost destroy your entire room?"

I simply nodded.

He groaned, smacking the palm of his hand on his face. "All right, well, just don't hurt yourself, please?" he begged as I hid my scratched hand.

I bobbed my head in agreement. "Yes, Master."

He smiled, "Good," before walking out.

I remained silent until I knew he was completely gone. Once I didn't feel his presence anymore, I sobbed again.

_**I have nothing left to give...**_

_**I have found a perfect end...**_

_**You were made to make it hurt...**_

_**Disappear into the dirt...**_

_**Carry me to heaven's arms.**_

_**Light the way and let me go...**_

_**Take the time to take my breath.**_

_**I will end where I began.**_

_**And I will find the enemy within,**_

_**Cause I can feel it crawl beneath my skin...**_

_**Dear agony,**_

_**Just let go of me.**_

_**Suffer slowly...**_

_**Is this the way it's got to be?**_

_**Dear agony?**_

_**Suddenly, the lights go out...**_

_**Let forever drag me down...**_

_**I will fight for one last breath,**_

_**I will fight until the end...**_

_**And I will find the enemy within,**_

_**Cause I can feel it crawl beneath my skin...**_

_**Dear agony,**_

_**Just let go of me.**_

_**Suffer slowly...**_

_**Is this the way it's got to be?**_

_**Don't bury me!**_

_**Faceless enemy,**_

_**I'm so sorry...**_

_**Is this the way it's got to be?**_

_**Dear agony? **_

_**Leave me alone... **_

_**God, let me go.**_

_**All blue and cold...**_

_**Black sky will burn...**_

_**Love, pull me down...**_

_**Hate, lift me up...**_

_**Just turn around...**_

_**There's nothing left...**_

_**Somewhere far beyond this world...**_

_**I feel nothing anymore...**_

_**Dear agony,**_

_**Just let go of me.**_

_**Suffer slowly...**_

_**Is this the way it's got to be?**_

_**Don't bury me!**_

_**Faceless enemy,**_

_**I'm so sorry...**_

_**Is this the way it's got to be?**_

_**Dear agony? **_

_**I feel nothing anymore...**_

The lovely words that Anakin whispered into my ear as we slept, so long ago, echoed in my thoughts. It heard as if he were right next to me again.

Rubbing my injured hand, I walked slowly to look out the enormous window.

The tiny water droplets tapped against the window, making Coruscant look beautiful in some way.

I wish I could just go outside and run through the rain. I've done it before... Until Master Plo caught me and got me in trouble. I frowned.

I can never do anything right. Even the words that come out of my mouth are apparently a problem...

"What are you doing?" a beautiful voice asked.

I turned around, wiping the tears away as quickly as I could and saw him standing at the doorway.

"Nothing," I replied, sighing. I turned back to look at the rain.

I tensed up when he was right behind me. "Soka, listen, I'm so sorry -"

"Save it, Anakin... You've done what you've always wanted to do." I snapped, crossing my arms above my chest, snuggling my body against the blanket that was around me.

"And what is that?" he asked coldly.

I didn't dare to turn around and look at him. "Don't play stupid with me, Anakin... You've never loved me. When you told me to get over you... M-my mind kept telling me that perhaps you've never loved me. That you just felt bad that an idiot girl never had a relationship before, she gets picked on, that nobody understood her... And that idiot girl was me. That's what I've thought during those first days after we broke up... But now I realize that you were trying to protect me from getting hurt... You were afraid that something bad would happen just like what happened before you met me... I wanted to tell you this when you said it was over and I begged for you not to say that... 'Will it change your life? If I changed my mind?' "

"Ahsoka, please. I'm sorry... I'm sorry that I've hurt you..."

I gripped my injured hand tightly. "What has only hurt me is when you're not around." I whispered, turning to face him.

His face was apologetic and it matched his tone of voice. "I'm sorry..." he breathed, stroking my wet cheeks.

"You've done nothing wrong, Anakin." I said, holding his hand. "What has only hurt me is when I don't see you, when I don't hear from you... It kills me." I began to cry.

He suddenly kissed me, backing me up to the window. I gasped, our foreheads touching as our lips lingered for more.

"Anakin, stop," I cried softly, pushing him away.

He pulled back, holding my hands in front of us. "Ahsoka, please... I'm so sorry."

"Anakin, you said so yourself that you wanted this to end -"

"Because I needed time to figure things out, Soka." he noted, kissing my hand.

I sighed, "And you promised me that you'd be here as long as we don't get caught by the council... Did they make you end our relationship? Did they find out?" I growled, walking away from him.

He remained silent; I could feel his anger slowly rising.

I sighed furiously as he walked out.

"Just to let you know... I only did this because I love you." he whispered, turning to leave.

I gaped at him, placing my hand on the doorway as I stood there, completely lost and confused.


	3. Beg

**Ahsoka Tano's POV **

Anakin was still... He still loved me. I didn't even know he'd still feel that way about me.

I lay on the most isolated hallway of the Temple. I doubt they'd be looking for me because they don't really need me. The Jedi Council only asks for me when it's about Anakin.

The entire day I've been thinking it through. Finally, I wiped the tears away and went straight to his dorm.

The younglings skipped around the hallways, laughing and having a great time. I wish I could be doing that instead of being depressed and feeling all alone.

"Hi, Padawan Tano," Petro greeted me.

I smiled, "Hello, Petro, how are you? I haven't seen you in a long time."

Petro laughed, "Yeah, I know... I've been good, being a Padawan is harder than I thought." he complained.

I laughed, "I know that feeling..." I said, then I frowned, looking straight forward as I thought of the past.

"Padawan Tano? Ahsoka?" Petro's alarmed voice caught my attention.

I blinked hard once and looked down at him. "Sorry... I'm just -"

"Is it about Master Skywalker?" Petro asked, arching an eyebrow.

My eyes widen. "No... No, I'm just tired."

Petro kept his eyebrow in place but I tried my best to smile at him, to convince him.

"Well, some Jedi keep talking about how your Master and you had a very heated argument and that -"

"Petro, don't believe everything that everyone says, ok?" I said.

He nodded, understanding that I needed some time alone.

Knocking on Anakin's door, I held the ring he gave me just a few weeks ago.

"Anakin," a very familiar female's voice whispered.

I leaned against the door to hear more clearly.

"I love you. And nothing will ever change that." the woman's voice continued to speak.

"The same goes for you, Padme." Anakin's voice spoke.

I clutched my hand and held it against my chest. I cupped my mouth so my heartbroken sobs cannot be heard.

I could hear their lips smacking and it made me more heartbroken. I was completely dead when I heard Anakin say, "I love you so much,"

I couldn't take it no longer. I got up from my knees and ran as fast as I could. I locked my door and sobbed my eyes out against my pillow.

_**Hours later...**_

"Ahsoka," Barriss's voice whispered, she shook my shoulder slightly in order to wake me up.

I turned around and she gasped.

"What is it?" She asked, holding me closer to her.

I leaned against her for support. I didn't want to tell her anything about Anakin, so, I told her something else that caused me to be like this.

She was like a sister to me. No... Not like, she was my sister. She is like my real sister. Even though we aren't blood related or anything... We love each other as sisters.

"Hi, Barriss. I missed you." I smiled slightly before sighing. "Riyo is starting to sound like Obi-Wan..."

Barriss hugged me tighter. "Missed you, too." She said, then, she pulled away to look into my eyes. "What do you mean?"

I wiped my tears away with my hand, not caring to get a tissue. "She said the same thing when Obi-Wan told me to forget about Anakin. She holoprojected me and she was angry. Or she was getting pissed off because I believe she's had enough of me..."

Barriss's face turned sorrowful. "Really?" she breathed.

"Yeah..." I said, barley audible.

"Ugh," she growled, frowning.

I got up and walked over to the window. "I haven't talked to her besides using the HoloNet."

Barriss looked outside the window but didn't leave her spot. "I'm sorry, Ahsoka."

"It's fine, Barriss. Eventually, we've been friends since we were really young, and if she's really my friend... Then, she'll understand and be at my side..." I told her.

She nodded, smiling. "True. A true friend will be by your side no matter what... and I hope she does that for you."

I smiled slightly, turning around to face her. "You've been doing that... Hearing my crap... Me going on and on..."

Barriss frowned. "It's not crap. This means a lot to you and I'm here to listen to you, sis. I love you."

"That means a lot to me, sis." I chuckled. "Barriss, I can't stand not being with him. I miss him so much."

Before she could say a word, her comlink beeped. She looked at it for a brief second before gazing at me with sorrow.

I motioned her to leave. "Go, sis.

The Republic needs you... They're all relying on you. Just like I am..." I sighed, closing my eyes, holding back the tears. I shook slightly, continuing to hold the tears. "Go..."

She hugged me, before leaving to go to a mission.

I collapsed onto my knees and hugged myself, curling up.

After a few minutes of laying on the ground, I got up and walked around the Temple.

"Ahsoka?" Anakin's voice whispered, "Snips, where are you?"

The bright lights of the daylight made me groan. I rubbed my eyes, they were burning like hell.

"I don't want to talk to you, Anakin." I hissed, turning around to head towards my room again.

"Ahsoka, what is going on?" Anakin barked, I could feel his anger boiling but I didn't care. Sure he always scared me whenever he was angry but right now... I didn't seem to care.

"Everything, Anakin." I said, clenching my teeth.

"Ahsoka, I'm sorry." he announced, making me face him.

"Anakin, your my life..." I breathed, 'Not anymore,' I thought.

"I'm some guy that is your Master. I'm not your life, Ahsoka." he said, as we made it to my dorm.

"So what? Yesterday, you wanted me back... And now you've changed your mind again?" I growled, "Okay, Anakin, listen. This is my fault that I doubted you. And I'm sorry. I should've never listened to my now former friend. She doesn't know you and I don't know why I listened to her. And I have never doubted you except Thursday but that was my first time." I whispered, our argument was caused because I told Barriss that a fellow Jedi told me that Anakin has been lying to me. "I still love you and I loved you the entire time you left to settle things on Tatoonie. And, no, you're not just "some guy" you are an important person in my life. I made a huge mistake on Thursday and I wish I could erase it."

"Ahsoka," Anakin groaned, "Ahsoka, knock this off, please. I have a lot going on right now and I'm not going to put you through it with me. I left so I could try to sort things out for myself and they got worse. You can't be in love with me anymore, Ahsoka."

I sighed, "I know you have a lot going on, but I don't care if I go through it with you. I've had my share of problems too. Who says I can't?"

"I said you can't damn it." Anakin said coldly.

The air hitched in my throat, tears welled up in my eyes. "So, if it was Padme you'd go through willingly huh?" I questioned him, crossing my arms above my chest.

"Do you really wanna go there right now?" he asked, his voice heard so cold. So angry...

I sighed, "No... I just... I don't want to argue anymore... Anakin, you mean a lot to me and I can't just let you go and pretend I never knew you. It's hard..."

"First you accuse me of lying to you about heading to Tatoonie. Now you're bringing Padme into this? I haven't thought about her or talked to her at all since her and some other guy got together. They're happy and I'm happy for them. So are you accusing me of cheating on you for Padme now?" his eyes were filled with hatred.

"No, because I know that whatever his name is and Padme are happy together! And I'm happy for them too!" I sobbed, looking at him with pleading eyes. "How many times do I have to tell you that I'm sorry that I accused you?! I'll say it a million times if I have to!"

Anakin's frown deepened. "Then why the hell would you bring her up in this?"

"Because I heard you and Padme talking to each other!" I cried, frowning.

His eyes widen. "What?"

"I heard you and Padme... Anakin, I can't deal with you lying to me anymore..." I managed to say through my tears. "But I'm afraid of loosing you."

"Ahsoka, Padme's in Naboo right now." he said, "Why would you think she and I are back together? She hates me."

"I heard you two saying that you love each other and... Kissing."

"Oh that... I was just looking through some old videos I had in my room." he admitted. "I was watching every single one of them to make sure I don't throw one out that I made of you."

I shook my head, "Anakin, just... Just go." I whispered, "I want to be left alone..."

Anakin hesitated but left with a sadden expression.

_**"Beg," Evan's Blue **_

_**There's a lit cigarette...**_

_**In the hand of my new angel...**_

_**She's blowing smoke like halos, and now everybody wants her**_

_**But I shouldn't even bother**_

_**Because you made me so complete, dear, but you left me so alone here.**_

_**Hang a noose for my new sinner... Somewhere everyone can see it...**_

_**Won't you beg me and then tell me how to love you?**_

_**Like anybody else would?**_

_**I know you're risking failure... (Risking failure)**_

_**Go run for cover **_

_**(For how long?)**_

_**You better start to love her so much you're moving on and on...**_

_**Now there's a whole wide world...**_

_**That wants to know...**_

_**Have cheap hotels lost their turn-on? **_

_**She's bathing in the neon,**_

_**And she's polluting all the airways, while I'm passed out in the hallway...**_

_**And you left me so in love here, you left with so much hate, dear.**_

_**Was I creating only chaos-this world lives just fine without us?**_

_**Won't you?**_

_**Beg me and then tell me how to love you!**_

_**Like anybody else would!**_

_**I know you're risking failure (Risking failure)**_

_**Go run for cover **_

_**(For how long?)**_

_**You better start to love her so much you're moving on and on...**_

_**Will it change your life?**_

_**If I change my mind?**_

_**When she's lit the whole wide world...**_

_**I want to know if you will beg me and then tell me how to love you?**_

_**Like anybody else would?**_

_**I know you're risking failure, (Risking failure) **_

_**But I'd hope you set your levels (For how long?)**_

_**So you can run for cover...**_

_**You better start to love her now. Are we this pathetic? **_

_**You made me finally see it!**_

_**(Will it change your life? **_

_**When I change my mind?**_

_**Will it change your mind?**_

_**When I change my life?)**_

_**Go run for cover!**_

_**You better fucking love her!**_

_**So much you're moving on!**_

_**I'm so pathetic, **_

_**You made me finally see it!**_

_**Got what you want?**_

_**I'm gone!**_

_**For how long? **_

_**For how long? **_

_**For how long will it change your life?**_


	4. Can We Start Again?

**A/N: I hope you guys like the story so far. :) I'm thinking about making it short or something. -shrugs- I don't really have that much ideas for this storyline but I'm hoping to make the best ending ever. 3 P.S. this story isn't 100% of what happened in my life. **

**Anisoka28- And to my lovely sister. Thanks, sis! 3 **

**Anakin Skywalker****'s POV**

I made my way to my room, ignoring the little side comments of fellow Jedi.

Why did I have to be in this situation? I hate myself because of my past... I always hurt my loved ones and I've done it again.

I continued to walk down the halls of the Temple until I crossed Ahsoka's room. I smiled when I remembered last December...

I told her that I wanted her forever and always. That we'd grow old together even though we had our rough times.

Whenever I hurt her or someone I cared about... I would hurt myself. I hate doing it... But that's what keeps me from hurting someone I love.

Ahsoka was outside, writing in her notebook and listening to music. She gazed down at her notebook as she moved her head to the music.

I smiled and walked over to her. I didn't care if she wanted me there or not, I wanted her and I'm hoping she would want me back. I won't force her to be back with me... I want her to be happy.

"Hey," I walked up in front of her.

Ahsoka looked up, confused. "Hi," she whispered, placing her notebook aside.

"Listen, I want to talk to you." I said, holding her hand.

She slowly released her hand from my grip. "About what?"

"You and I."

Her eyes snapped wide open. "What about you and I?"

I shifted uncomfortable, saying, "I'm so sorry of what I've done... I wish I wasn't so mad about the whole thing... And I'm sorry that I didn't contact you in an entire month... I should've told you that I won't be able to contact you because I was trying to calm things down back home -"

"I would've understand, Master -"

I arched an eyebrow.

"Anakin. You could've told me that. I would've been more relaxed and not fearing the worst... Every night if I didn't hear from you, I feared the worst. I was so afraid and I told Barriss that one day God may take you completely away from me... And I always tried to push those thoughts away and dream of you and I." she smiled slightly, blushing.

"Really?" I breathed, inching my hand closer and closer by the second.

She looked from the corner of her eye to see my hand and sighed. "Yeah," she instantly grabbed my hand. "One night..." she laughed. "One night I actually dreamt of you actually being here with me while you were away... And when I woke up..." she laughed again.

"What?" I chuckled, scooting closer to her, wrapping my arm over her shoulders.

"You might think this is so stupid..." she said, rubbing her face.

I laughed with her this time. "Tell me... Have I ever told you that anything you say is stupid?"

She turned her head to look at me. "No... You got a point, Anakin. You always said I'm beautiful, that I have natural beauty, that you wish you could take care of me when you're not here with me, that I don't need any products to make me look beautiful... And that's what I truly love about you. You're so kind, so beautiful, so caring and you love me for me... Nobody has ever said any of the things you've said to me... You were meant for me. And I love you so much. I love you forever and always."

"I _meant_ every single thing I've said, Ahsoka." I whispered, lifting up her chin for her watery eyes to look into mine. "You are the most beautiful girl both inside and out. I love you just as much."

She held my hands that cupped her face as the tears trickles down her cheeks. "I know... When I woke up from the dream... I felt like you were actually there next to me while I was lying down in bed... I had tears in my eyes because the dream that I had was so beautiful and it felt so real... I just wanted you."

"Ahsoka, I love you... So much." I told her.

She giggled, "I know, my love."

I leaned down closer to her face until her lips brushed against mine. I immediately picked her up to twirl us in circles.

She giggled and kissed me. "I love you,"

"Hope you know I love you just as much." I told her. "Why don't I take you to dinner?"

She pulled back. "That would be nice."

We stayed there for what seemed like forever... And I wish I could have stayed there forever because I would've wanted to have this moment back when all of this would end.


	5. Forever & Always

**Third Person POV**

Anakin aboard his starfighter, smiling as he looked at the bouquet of flowers he got for Ahsoka. He was happy their relationship was as stronger as ever.

Ahsoka got everything ready, arranging the table, lighting the candles and making their apartment look beautiful.

The day was at its dawn, the beautiful colors of warm violet and cool violet dominated the sky, giving it a romantic look.

She smiled happily, butterflies swarming inside of her. Ahsoka was happier than ever because she had Anakin again and that nothing would tear them apart.

She immediately looked at herself in the mirror after she showered and dressed herself in something elegant and pretty.

Ahsoka sighed and sat on the dining table, looking outside at the beautiful night.

Anakin swarmed his way through the crowded streets of Coruscant, eager to get home.

Suddenly, his starfighter began to loose control and he quickly parked it and began fixing it.

"Damn thing," he cursed, walking up to the engine and began fixing.

He heard a couple of aliens and humans murmur and such but he didn't pay much attention.

"Hey," A Rodian male came up to him, tapping him on his shoulder.

Anakin turned around, a few dark oil marks on his forehead. "Hello," he smiled and continued his work.

"How much for the girl?" A drunk human male asked, laughing with a couple of other men.

Anakin stiffened, his eyes widened. He dropped his tools and glared at the group. "How much for the girl?" he repeated angrily, his fists clenching tightly against his sides.

"Yeah, the little bitch you have." he said, "She used to go to my school and she has this weird problem... I don't even know what the hell she had but I'd bother her a lot... She was so different than all the other girls and that's what I targeted her for because she was weak."

Anakin growled, clenching his teeth. "So you're the fucking kid that hurt her?!" he shouted, throwing the wrench to the side.

The male backed away, tumbling on his own feet because he was so wasted. "Hey now, man. That was a long time ago..."

"That happened a few months ago!" Anakin yelled, "She told me the things you did to her!"

"Like what?"

"You called her a lazy bitch and you hit her!" He roared, punching the man. "Anything you say about her that hurts her makes me get angry, heck, if I knew you when she told me of the things you did, I swear that I would've killed you in a sec."

"Violent, aye?" the male laughed, getting up.

Anakin cracked his knuckles and lunge forward for the man. The man was simply to easy to beat. He was too drunk and stupid to know what's coming to him. That is until the group joined and began to attack Anakin.

The Rodian began to speak in his native language, coming in front of him.

Anakin looked at him, he was about shoulder height to Anakin and was wielding a little pocket knife.

"Oh no, you're not going to kill me with that?" he asked in a fake scared tone.

He began to walk away, thinking that they've had enough of fighting.

"Hey, where are ya going?" someone from the group shouted.

Anakin turned around, "What the fuck do you want?"

The thicker guy shoved Anakin against the wall, "You're gonna listen, and you're going to listen good." he whispered menacingly.

Anakin sighed, "Is that right?"

"Yeah." said the guy as he began to draw out his knife.

Anakin punched him in the side of his head and got the other guy in his manly area. Anakin straddled the thicker one, "What happened? Oh that's right, I'm a Jedi. You don't wanna fuck with me. I've beat the shit out of my father and he was a lot bigger than you." said Anakin as he held on to the guys collar.

He shoved the guy to the ground and walked away again.

"Shit," he whispered, examining his throbbing black eye.

His lip was busted and he had a few tiny cuts on his face but other than that, he was okay.

He hopped onto his starfighter and headed back home.

Anakin wasn't paying much attention until a ship came out from parking and smashed it's rear to Anakin's starfighter.

"Goddamn it!" he cursed, trying to control his starfighter but he had no chance.

His starfighter flipped and knocked some other vehicles before he blacked out.

**"Forever and Always" - Parachute **

_**'She's sitting at the table,**_

_**The hours get later...**_

_**He was supposed to be here.**_

_**She's sure he would have called.**_

_**She waits a little longer, **_

_**There's no one in the driveway...**_

_**No one's said they've seen him**_

_**Why, is something wrong?'**_

Ahsoka drummed her fingers against the table, looking at the clock.

_8:30 pm... _

He's supposed to be here an hour ago...

She sighed; he would've called if he couldn't make it. Ahsoka decided to wait a little longer, about one more hour...

Ahsoka's eyes shifted to their apartment's veranda. She sighed, his fighter wasn't there.

She hasn't heard from him, neither has Obi-Wan, Barriss, Rex, Cody... They haven't seen him...

Ahsoka bits her lip, looking down at her hands. She checked her HoloPhone a couple of times, beginning to get worried.

_**'She looks back to the window**_

_**Suddenly the phone rings,'**_

Ahsoka gazed up to look out the window again, sighing.

She flinched when her HoloPhone rang. She quickly answered, her voice breaking when she answered with a "Hello?"

_**'A voice says something's happened,**_

_**That she should come right now...' **_

"Is this Ahsoka Tano?"

"Yes, it's me." she replied.

"We're to notify that your master has been in a horrific accident a few hours ago, he wishes to speak to you." the caller said.

_**'Her mind goes to December.**_

_**She thinks of when he asked her,**_

_**He bent down on his knees first...'**_

She remembered when they first declared their love for each other.

It was in December, they were walking around the Temple's garden and Anakin took her to a secret place where he hides whenever he was a Padawan.

He smiled at her and got on his knees.

_**'And he said: **_

_**I want you forever, **_

_**Forever and always...**_

_**Through the good and the bad and the ugly...**_

_**We'll grow old together.**_

_**Forever and always...'**_

_**'She pulls up to the entrance.**_

_**She walks right to the front desk.**_

_**They lead her down a million halls, a maze that's never ending...'**_

Ahsoka parked her starfighter in front of the hospital where Anakin was kept.

She raced to the front desk and asked the nurse.

"Where's Anakin Skywalker?"

"Room 598." she answered, smiling warmly. "But I wouldn't think he's okay for a visit."

"Why not? I need to see him." Ahsoka hissed, frowning.

"Young lady, I told you that he isn't ready for visitors."

"I need to see him!"

"Are you Ahsoka Tano?" A new voice dominated their voices.

Ahsoka turned around and saw a few doctors with worn out faces. She nodded.

"Come with us," the male announced, leading her through the while halls.

_**'They talk about what happened, but she can barely hear them,'**_

Ahsoka kept her mind focused on Anakin. She didn't pay attention to what happened, all she wanted to know was if he was okay.

_**'She tries to keep a straight face as she walks into the room...**_

_**She sits by his bedside, **_

_**Holds his hand too tight,'**_

Ahsoka finally made it to Anakin's room, keeping herself from breaking down. Anakin was badly beaten and managed to survive the accident.

She sat down on the chair that was placed next to his bed and held his cold hand.

He opens his eyes, revealing his beautiful blue eyes.

"Hey," his hoarse voice spoke.

_**'They talk about the kids they're gonna have and the good life...**_

_**The house on the hillside, **_

_**Where they would stay...'**_

Ahsoka smiled as she told him the plan of hers.

She wanted to live away from their families and start a new life. That they could have a beautiful future. Ahsoka told him that she wanted to have children that looked more like Anakin than her.

She told him that they could live in Shili forever and always. He smiled as she gave him the details of their future together.

_**'Stay there forever, **_

_**Forever and always...**_

_**Through the good and the bad and the ugly**_

_**We'll grow old together, **_

_**And always remember...**_

_**Whether rich or for poor or for better...**_

_**We'll still love each other, **_

_**Forever and always...'**_

She saw them in the most beautiful part of her home-world and two mostly human kids, Benjamin and Jane, chasing each other as Ahsoka and Anakin watched them and lived their lives in peace.

_**'Then she gets an idea and calls in the nurses...**_

_**Brings up the chaplain and he says a couple verses...**_

_**She borrows some rings from the couple next door...**_

_**Everybody's laughing as the tears fall on the floor...**_

_**She looks into his eyes, **_

_**And she says...' **_

Ahsoka's eyes snapped open and she immediately called in the nurses, and brings in the Chaplain.

Anakin held Ahsoka's hands in his and sighed as the Pastor said a couple of verses.

Before the tiny ceremony started, she borrowed some rings from a couple next door.

Anakin laughed, rolling his eyes.

All of them joined him, tears streaming down their faces but mostly Ahsoka's eyes were leaking.

Ahsoka looked deeply into his eyes, smiling.

_**'I want you forever, **_

_**Forever and always...**_

_**Through the good and the bad and the ugly...**_

_**We'll grow old together,**_

_**And always remember...**_

_**Whether happy or sad or whatever.**_

_**We'll still love each other, **_

_**Forever and always...**_

_**Forever and always, **_

_**Forever and always..."**_

_**'She finishes the vows but the beeps are getting too slow...'**_

Ahsoka finished the vows, crying. Her heart beats faster when her hearing caught Anakin's heart monitor.

_**'His voice is almost too low.**_

_**As he says...'**_

Anakin's lips were moving but nothing came out... Then, he pulled her closer, kissed her, and whispered against her forehead.

"_**I love you forever, **_

_**Forever and always...**_

_**Please just remember even if I'm not there...**_

_**I'll always love you, **_

_**Forever and always..."**_

Anakin stroked her wet cheeks.

Ahsoka cried, feeling his right hand lose its grip, his left hand fall and his breath being taken away...


	6. Valentin d'amour & Te Extraño

**Ahsoka Skywalker's POV**

"_Le coeur qui crie l'amour,_

_pour cette femme tout les jours,_

_celle qui a notre coeur,_

_et notre bonheur ..._

_Une femme parfaite à nos yeux,_

_nos yeux tant amoureux,_

_on était à la recherche d'amour,_

_et enfin elle est là chaque jour ..._

_Une saint-valentin dans ses bras,_

_où on glisse des mots tout bas,_

_pour dire son amour,_

_qui pour elle durera toujours ..._

_Elle qui a notre coeur,_

_qui sèche nos pleurs,_

_et en cette belle saint-valentin,_

_cet amour ne fait qu'un ..._

_Certains attendent des bébés,_

_et d'autres seulement à s'aimer,_

_certains vont se mariés,_

_et d'autres l'amour fêté .."_

Anakin's velvet voice echoed through my head... The blissful night we had a year ago. He whispered that beautiful poem into my ear when he and I faire l'amour.

It's been almost a week since Anakin's... Passing. My family came once the news reached Shili.

As of now, I couldn't stop thinking of killing myself... I always asked myself, 'Why am I here?' and other questions.

My mother comforted me the most, even though she and I didn't quite get along at times.

I wept, closing my eyes tightly as I sat there in front of some caskets. Anakin wanted a real funeral, not the normal Jedi way. So, I promised him and I'm keeping that promise.

"Ahsoka," my mother whispered, rubbing my arms. "Don't feel bad... He -"

"Mother, just stop, ok?" I hissed through my teeth. "I can't do this right now... I want to be left alone." I got up and stormed out of the room.

"Ahsoka," my mother called.

I walked up straight to my apartment that hasn't been filled with life in the past week. This was my first time I've been here since Anakin's accident.

I walked over and touched the things and places Anakin had touched. My fingers lightly traced the bed sheets of our bed and I looked at a picture Anakin always loved.

He was in it, having the biggest smile in his entire life with me by his side. It was at the break of dawn, and snow was all you could see besides the beautiful pine and oak forest surrounding us.

We held each other, smiling as the sunlight's rays hit out faces gently.

I sighed, closing my eyes as I held an object in my life. Gasping as I pierced through my flesh.

_'Te extraño si no estoy con vos_

_te extraño aunque este con vos..._

_Te necesito para creer,_

_te necesito para existir..._

_te quiero sin explicacion..._

_sos parte de mi porque y de mi tal vez,_

_te quiero porque mi amor_

_por vos es interminable..._

_te extraño , te quiero, te necesito..._

_para existir sin mas explicacion_

_porque mi amor es interminable si estoy o no con vos...'_

**A/N: The amazing poems are beautiful to me. The first one is in French, which I'm likely half French, and the second one is in Spanish, my first language. 3 **

**"Valentin d'amour," Douce Saint**

**"Te Extraño," Anibal Costa.**

**And to Jenni Rivera! 3 you will be missed. **


End file.
